Baby weight...

I have never been one to REALLY be concerned about my weight... I have dieted and attempted to work out but most of my life I never really had to do anything. When I met hubby until I got pregnant with my first child I gained 5 lbs every year. That adds up to a lot of pounds. Still I wasn't very motivated. After Bear was born I and I lost the initial baby weight I was still up about 15 lbs, 5 of which I lost just in time to find out I was pregnant with Bees. Now after baby #2 I am up 30 lbs from before I started to have kids. I know this is normal and it should take as long to take it off as it did to put it on... but all of a sudden I am concerned with my weight. First of all I go back to work in 2 days (eek that just squeezed my heart), and I do not have 1 pair of pants that really fits except maternity... yuck!
We were out running around yesterday... I was wearing a pair of maternity pants that have survived the duration of 2 pregnancies... 18 months of clumsy pregnancy eating... and they are slightly stained in a few places. I also had on a maternity sweater because I couldn't find anything else. My daughter had chocolate milk spilled on her pants and between the two of us we were a hot mess. My husband nicely pointed out that maybe since we were going to the mall we could each buy some new pants...
So I went into a store I used to love... so excited that I no longer had to shop at a maternity store and could get back into clothes I liked! I grabbed the size I thought I would wear and a few the next size up just in case.... I tried on about 4 pairs of pants before I was no longer smiling... by the next 2 I had a horrible stomach ache... after the next 2 I sat on the floor and cried... I really cried... I couldn't believe that the largest size in this store did not fit me... I got it together and went to another store. I don't typically shop at this store because it's a little pricy.. I finally found a pair of jeans that fit around the waist. However I guess if you are as big as I am around the waist you are supposed to be 6 feet tall. Does anyone know what I should do with the extra foot of fabric? I was so glad to find something that fit my waist I didnt even care about the extra length. I guess I need to go buy some boots too now! At this point I was so depressed it didn't even occur to me that I DON'T need jeans. I cant wear jeans to work! Now I need to go out shopping AGAIN to find work pants before I go back to work in 2 days (eek!)
I checked out... spending a small fortune on an outfit for myself and Bear. I thought I had it together enough... Went to the bathroom and changed and met up with Erik and the girls. Before he could even get out that I looked great I was crying again. I couldn't believe I was crying in the middle of the Lego Store...
Conveniently this happened on New Year's Eve so I am making the stereotypical resolution to diet and work out and do anything short of running marathons...So friends I could use some encouragement... Tell me stories of how you have struggled, triumphed, or accepted your own situation... Tell me I can do it... and if nothing else... lie to me and tell me I look great in my tattered old maternity clothes when you see me because I honestly don't know if I can bear shopping again until I am down at least 1 size.